report from tokyo international airport.

So, my friends, as proof of why I am a loser, my college admission tally :

Accepted :
USC
NYU
Vassar

Rejected :
Amherst
Columbia

I wrote a long entry two seconds ago that mentioned my sleepy ambivalence to the newest college replies, but as I fight fatigue I'm beginning to have some kind of emotional response. Parts of me expected the replies that I received, and prepared me against death from utter shock. I'm accepting the fact that things rarely go according to plan, and that it's probably just God or the universe's way of telling me I should go to college in areas less remote and closer to capitalist society and profligate materialism. Either way, I still have no idea where I want to go, even if I only have to choose between the three schools that have, to my knowledge, accepted me so far. Flying over San Francisco reminded me that I really love California, but I also like the anonymity that I'm sure will come with being in NYU and I've always liked the course selections at Vassar. I'm not entirely sure what to do.

I feel like my holiday was too brief. Though I miss my bed a little, as well as the many eBay packages I hope will be waiting to welcome me back home, I kind of prefer the vacuum of being on holiday. Even though I bitched and whined internally about leg aches on the first day of skiing and irritating moguls on the slopes, the minute I left the resort I felt incredibly forlorn. I totally and completely love skiing, hapless as I am at it. Very often, I wish I was a great expert at it so I could skip tertiary education altogether and be a ski instructor and ski for the rest of my life, as my life.

I'm immensely tired, I hate impending jet lag and I wish someone interesting were online for me to talk to.